This week A Cup of Jo posted How to Write a Condolence Note. The piece was incredibly touching (you should read it) as well as full of practical advice. I’m going to bookmark it for future reference. I always try to keep in mind many of these points, but it’s always good to have a reminder, especially when they come from someone who’s been in this position.
I feel that the most important thing to remember is to keep your note sincere. You need to write as you, not using the language you think you should. An anecdote or your own phraseology will touch the griever so much more than a “with deepest sympathy, blah, blah…”
I also try to choose an uplifting (although respectful) card. (See my earlier post here.) Whatever has happened (however tragic) you want to remember a life, and it’s those memories that will give a person strength and make them smile again in the future. These cards become another tangible as a person slips out of their life; something to look at in the coming months and years.
Below are some of the cards I like, that make great starting points for your personal message.